Tuesday, November 4, 2014

saving heat for cold stones.



there is an old but new-found value that i've been
lucky to re-establish in my life these days.
it's something that came across again thanks
to a Tumblr post i saw a day or three ago. it
contained a simple message thrown up on a wall
in Krylon: 'you waste energy being angry'. it
was something i needed to see, and to focus
on. because i had been dealing with examples
of why it was fruitless to be angry and much
like having silence and hearing a temple bell
ring out suddenly, the truth of it hit me once
again and i got back to maintaining my calm.

now, i'm not going to say that anger isn't
necessary. it would be asking someone not to
express their humanity. anger can allow for
other things to flow more freely if they are
important. but there is a tendency with the
way things are, and the society we live in,
to look to irrational anger as a viable
solution for EVERY. THING. think about it -
if you're a Facebook user or Twitter user,
count how many messages are laden with anger
over minimal stuff. they can range from
bewildered exasperation to outright rants
filled with expletives. now think about how
many do that on a constant basis. if you can
count more than three people you know that
do this, that's a problem. one that we shrug
off a little too much. and it gets worse
'cause there are those who do this just to
seek validation for the anger, and not any
help in why said anger rose. for me, the
journey of self-care i'm on basically meant
that to realize that about other folks, i had
to realize that i fell prey to the same
things. there's different reasons why -
examples from a family member, the effects
of diet, bad decision making and not dusting
oneself off after - it all composes to that
core of anger along with other things.

it takes some time to get to a point where
you can recognize that the constant anger
over stuff you can control as opposed to
actually doing something about it is flat
out minor. it's not easy. and there are
those that will take you to that point,
especially if they are actively avoiding
doing that work behind a multitude of
excuses. i had a good friend earlier say
that actions by a mutual friend of ours
was 'tiring'. my rebuttal was, 'well, it's
tiring only if you give it more energy
than needed time after time after time
again.' we've all got people close to us
that try us like that, i'm no different.
but in order to be and live well, you have
to let them sort certain things out without
too much of your energy being taken up.
especially if it seems like it's often &
they're not mindful of you and your time.

there's some who'll dig what i'm saying
here. and others who'll look at this like
it's bull. Only thing i can say is, when
i chose to reserve anger only for something
that deserved it, i found that life got a
little bit more manageable. and as we
advance through life, that's all we really
want. 'you waste energy being angry'. i
intend to hold on to that energy for when
i really need it, and not for another long
story of an avoidable situation or another
social media rant from someone who wants
more attention for the rant than help for
what caused it.

thanks for reading...walk good.